Dear sweet little boy:
First, we're all very happy to have you here, and we can't imagine life without you. You are a source of cuteness and joy in all our lives.
But you are incapable of sleep, and that is really starting to grind us down. Mom, especially, is weary of feeding you several hours straight at night to keep you from screaming. The problem is, she can't fully sleep when you are eating, because she has to make sure you remain attached and happy. Your Dad is tired of having you shoved at him at five AM, with Mom saying she needs SOME sleep before morning. We're exhausted with the two hours of screaming this then entails.
Last night sucked. It wasn't all your fault, since Olivia began the festivities with vomiting. Then the crankiness began as soon as our heads hit the pillow. We all said things we didn't mean to each other. You scratched Mom's face and pinched her chest. Your parents may have told you to just shut up and go to sleep. Not anyone's finest hour.
I'd also like to address the daytime behavior. You are happy if one of us holds you, or you are nursing. Please be informed that this is not healthy for the family income, your chances of attending college, your Mom's sanity, or your physical development. Studies have shown that nine times out of ten, when Mom picks a fight with Dad, you have been crying. Give her a break, she's got issues.
Remember a few weeks ago, when you had naps during the day, and slept at night? By the way, this means a nap longer than ten minutes, preferably more than once a day. Remember happily watching Mom and Dad work for minutes at a time from the safety of your swing? Remember lying on a blanket, exercising your little round body and playing "Catch Those Toes?" Let's see more of that, please.
Love, your parents.
Art History Sunday: The Blind Girl
8 years ago





















2 comments:
Freaking Blogger won't let me restore this comment from Michelle, since I accidentally deleted it:
Oh, man ALIVE. Somedays I just sit there and think, "Sooo...the Lord told us to have children and multiply and replenish the Earth...but he also expects us to be good spouses...and that seems to me like expecting us to juggle chainsaws while riding a poodle."
Does that make Toby the poodle, and the kids chainsaws?
Post a Comment